Feb 18, 2008


We shan't bother with an excuse, right??


Oh hell. I've felt like crap the past week or so.

Annie frequently wonders how I can be so gosh-darned positive and hopeful--about everything--in spite of all the crap I've been dealt along the years.

{Spazziness, moronic ex-assholes, psychotic family etc}

Fucked if I know. Stupidity in hope, I suppose.

The past week I have not been so gosh-darned chirpy, though.

First of all, the new-old drugs?? We can now shout merrily 'Fuck YOU, Keppra!!'--because they haven't done dick to help me. I'm spazzing like a motherfucker. Hurrah!!

Oh wait. Not good!!

Then again I've only just re-started the regimen. We don't start the Zombification Levels til next week. I'm predicting the eminent Dr. Pinky and the Brain will jack me up to, oh, 2,500 mg. Or maybe 3000!! I'm on 1500 now. Whee!! I won't know who I am or what planet I'm on, but maybe I'll stop spazzing.

{Oh ha ha HAAAAAAAA. As if I believe THAT}

Anyway thinking about all that has made me decidely UN-hopeful. And definitely not chirpy. My mood can also just be because of the medication switch.

{And let us not forget the magic of hormones. Yay!!}

Seriously though, what's the good of not spazzing if I'm drugged to the point of crack-addictery?? WHAT'S THE FUCKING POINT??

Yes. Cranky. Did I mention that??

I will remain so until Wednesday, which is D-Day for ol' Lefty, my sole remaining (and currently cyst-ified) ovary. Sure, the pills probably shrank it into oblivion. Maybe. Possibly?? Who knows. I will not rest until I know for sure. I keep imagining the worst because, well, because I'm a fucking moron.

Just to round out the fun, my left wonky leg has had me in SUCH pain it isn't funny. I'd already procured a referral for an orthopedist--grudgingly, you understand. I seriously don't want to, but Fishface Wimpy demands it to be done. And I've been whinging about my Gimptarded Left Leg for how long?? Then this wacked out pain started. Everyone I know claims it's Sciatica. Which I call Bullshit. For I do not succumb to such sissy-mary-namby-pamby Structural Problems. Never!! I even had the good sense to Dr. Google said ailment to prove them wrong. Webmd Symptomchecker, prove them wrong!!

Oh I would gloat when I showed them the Webmd's ideas of what it could be. And then laugh heartily once at the office of said Orthopedist.

Course, the first thing it shot back at me was Fucking Sciatica.

I will remain in pain and denial until the orthopedist appointment. Because clearly webmd and their symptom checker thingie, is pure shite.

On another note, for reasons that will be explained on my new page, Spazzymoto will die with this post. If you want to follow me along leave a comment and I'll email the site name (I can grab your email off haloscan--no one else will see it). Or you'll just see when I comment on your page. And link!!

Now I've got to go put every single post here in drafts (why, oh, WHY is there not a simple way to do this??). That way when I move the archives to the new joint I can cull the pure crap I've written for the past *cough* years.

Which will leave me with, oh, a dozen old posts or so.

Happy Anni(blog)versary to me!!